A movie moment?

The entire night last night i was drinking just to get drunk. i was doing this because i was not motivated to go out in the first place, i was in a stupid funk i could not get out of, and i was pissed off/confused about my boy situation. Which is completely fucked by the way (more on that to come). so my night was pretty much sabotaged from the beginning.

i did not see the Best Friend Hookup all night, and received no texts/call from him. This angered me and destroyed my self-esteem further. but what completely capped off my night happened in the last five minutes.

To set up the scene, i accomplished my mission of getting drunk. i accomplished it so well and with such determination that i had to leave the bar before it closed because i was starting to get nauseous. So one of my friends, Red Head, offers to walk me home. since we are such good friends i thought nothing of it. Wrong.

i'm so drunk at this point i don't even want to go to late night to possibly see the Best Friend Hookup, who i had already drunkenly texted like a stupid stupid girl. Did i mention that Best Friend and Red Head are teammates...on the lacrosse team? oh yeah. My life looks like a effin' Greek tragedy.

But i digress.

Since i do not want to go to late night, and have drunkenly explained why to Red Head (which he apparently knew all about anyways), i decide to cut my losses and head home. Red Head says he just wants to go home too, and offers to walk me back since we live in the same apartment building. Once again, since we are good friends i think nothing of it. Wrong AGAIN.

We head back to his aparment because i thought all the guys who live with him were going to be up to party. unfortunately everyone was asleep, so me and Red Head just ended up hanging out on the couch talking for 20 minutes. All i desperately wanted to do was pass out, so i said goodnight to Red Head and walked upstairs.

I managed to get upstairs and close the apartment door. I walk through the common room and get to my bedroom door when i hear a knock. Thinking that one of my roomates must have forgotten her ID to get into the apartment, i open up the door without even looking through the peephole.

It's Red Head.

"Hey, I just wanted to do one thing"
He cups my face and kisses me. At this point i am so wasted and so surprised i just let it happen. And then because i am drunk, pissed off, and lonely, i start kissing him back. All during this event, the fact that this kiss is coming out of nowhere, and it's Best Friend Hookup's teammate is the only thing running through my head. We break apart, and i just stare at him.

"Sorry, I just wanted to do that"
"For how long?" is the only question i thought to ask.
"I don't know, i don't know" Red Head answers.
"Well, goodnight"

And he goes in again. and i respond again. by now i had no idea what was going on with my life and was just going with the flow. i pull away and say "Goodnight Red Head" and close the door.

I then proceed to freak out.
and all i can think is that i just have just stayed in.